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[Hogwarts] Bad dog

Sirius Black,

#7328
Location: Gryffindor Common Room • Date: May 1


Sirius was in danger. A madman was out to get him, forcing him into hiding. His allies were all gone. He could trust nobody. The only thing he could do was transfigure himself into an armchair and hope to Merlin that nobody unattractive decided to sit on him.

Re: [Hogwarts] Bad dog

James Potter,

#7336
He was gonna kill him, James decided as he stormed into the Gryffindor common room. Hazel eyes narrowed in suspicion. It was quiet...too quiet. James circled the room once,twice, three times before he stopped to inspect the new arm chair. Unless McGonagall had suddenly developed an urge to refurnish the common room, James was pretty sure the shabby piece of furniture was not supposed to be here. “I guess he’s not here,” said James, loudly, “But I am a bit tired. Suppose i’ll have a nap.” He collapsed upon Sirius the armchair with a little more force than necessary and starting slapping the cushions with the palms of his hands. “Got to work out allll the lumps.”

Three...two...one...

Re: [Hogwarts] Bad dog

Sirius Black,

#7338
Stay....still.....don't....react....you are a chair....be the chair, Sirius....be the chair......James doesn't know.....he'll nap and then wake up and forget it all happened....be the chair.....

Re: [Hogwarts] Bad dog

James Potter,

#7353
Convinced that the inconspicuous armchair was his friend, James repeatedly jabbed his pointed elbow into the back cushion. “They just don’t make these things like they use to.”

Re: [Hogwarts] Bad dog

Sirius Black,

#7360
The pair were very lucky that the common room was deserted, otherwise someone would be very confused by the fact that the back cushion suddenly bit James Potter's elbow before transforming into a dog which scampered towards the 6th year dorms.

Re: [Hogwarts] Bad dog

James Potter,

#7378
James yelped, leaping three feet in the air when the cushion suddenly grew teeth and bit his elbow. He wheeled around in time to see a large black dog make a mad dash for the dorms. “Padfoot! I swear to Merlin I will remove every squeaker out of every single one of your toys unless you get back here now!”

James reached for an expired copy of the daily prophet and rolled it up.

“Get back here!”

The chase was on.

Re: [Hogwarts] Bad dog

Lily Evans,

#7383
With a heavy sigh, Lily started to leave her dormitory to head down to the common room. She had some homework to do, after all, and it was a bit more comfortable down there. When she heard the decidedly James-sounding yelp, though, she thought better of it. Best not to get involved with whatever shenanigans Potter was getting up to. Instead, she turned back and went to lie on her bed to look over some Charms notes.

Re: [Hogwarts] Bad dog

Sirius Black,

#7522
Sirius bolted up the stairs to the dorms, and screeched to a halt. There was a people in there! Not just any people, as his canine sniffers revealed, but a certain Lilly Evans! What was Lilly Evans doing in the boy's dor.....
Genius that he was, Sirius Black had scarpered up the wrong staircase. With a yelp Sirius toppled backwards as the alarm bells clanged and the stairs smoothed themselves into a slide.

Where a dog sniffed in confusion at the top of the stairs, now a young man sat ass-backwards at the base, feet dangling by his face, staring upside-down at his pursuer. Sirius-the-human put on his best puppy eye impression.

Re: [Hogwarts] Bad dog

James Potter,

#7644
“I hope you’re happy with yourself,” scolded James as he glared down at his best friend.. He held on tight to the rolled-up newspaper and pressed the end to Sirius’s forehead. “The tea party may have been my idea, but it was your idea to invite the family of man eating spiders, or did you forget that lovely little nugget of a detail in our plan?! “

Re: [Hogwarts] Bad dog

Sirius Black,

#7692
Looking up at James from between his legs, Sirius rapidly shook his head, miming silence. Shut...up.....Evans...upstairs.... he hissed to James....entirely through telepathy. Telepathy was real magic, right? It was magic to the muggles in the swimsuit magazines he kept, and all muggle magic was real magic in the end, right?

Of course, none of this was expressed to his friend aloud, save for some strange grunts and a guilty smile plastered across the young student's face.

Re: [Hogwarts] Bad dog

James Potter,

#7744
His eyes flicked up towards the stairs, down at Sirius, up the stairs, and back on Sirius “…she’s up there…. isn’t she?” asked James, his brow line creasing.

They had been friends long enough for James to pick up on Sirius’s nonverbal communications. It was the reason their pranks were so perfectly executed (most of the time anyway) and the method behind having a full-on conversation in the middle of class without talking or note passing.

WACK! WACK! WACK!

James started hitting Sirius over the head with the rolled-up newspaper. It wasn’t enough to bring any harm to his friend, but it was enough to get the point across.

Nonverbal communication indeed.

Re: [Hogwarts] Bad dog

Sirius Black,

#8026
"Ow! Ow! Prongs cut it out! Hey!" A flurry of flailing limbs followed these exclamations as Sirius scrambled to pull himself into a mostly-upright position. Extracting his wand from his pocket, Sirius pointed at the newspaper, which promptly shot itself up James Potter's left nostril. Jeez, try to warn a friend and this was the thanks he got? Getting smacked about the head with a rolled-up newspaper?

Re: [Hogwarts] Bad dog

James Potter,

#8058
James yanked the newspaper from his nostril and angrily threw it across the room.

“You fed me to the wolves-Or lions- rather, THE lion! Thank Merlin McGongall has a fondness for me. She would have eaten me otherwise. You owe me for this, Padfoot. I took the fall for OUR plan.”

Re: [Hogwarts] Bad dog

Sirius Black,

#9596
"Hey, come on!" Sirius whined from his sprawled position on the carpet (he was now fixing his hair through his reflection in a windowpane). "I left you alone because she's got a fondness for you. D'you really think I've done that if it were Kettleburn or Flitwick? Anyway -" Sirius was now bunching up clumps of his hair, turning his head this way and that to admire the effects of the various 'hairstyles' through the windowpane. "You're starting to sound like you regret what we did. It was a good plan, Prongs. Or did McGonagall suddenly put the fear of Merlin into you?"

Re: [Hogwarts] Bad dog

James Potter,

#10659
James placed a hand on his chest in a dramatic fashion. “How dare you, Sir!” He reached down to pluck his friend of the floor by the back collar of his shirt to right him on his feet again. “I regret nothing.”

James let go of Sirius and made his way over to the tiny table where an unfinished game of wizard’s chess was arranged. “I’m just trying to look good in front of Evans. Now that were friends she’s actually paying attention to the things I do.”

The sixteen-year-old reset the chessboard and motioned for his friend to join him.

“Padfoot, there are only three women in this world that I am afraid of pissing off: McGonagall, Evans, and my mother. And if one gets pissed off, they all get pissed off. If McGonagall owls my mum, then my mum will send a howler to which Evans will also find out what we did and I get an earful from all three witches. It’s a chain event.”